Responsibilities to others

Being responsible for other people is annoying. I got my shit together, why can't they?
Why do I have to live my life by their schedule, just because I'm the only one who can be mature and responsible?
I hate having to deal with everyone and their lives and their wants. People are annoying, to an extreme. Keeping them happy is annoying. Placating them is tedious. Not arguing with every stupid thought that crosses their lips is a strain.
I like college because I have friends now who can drive and take care of themselves and are responsible. But I'm still lugging around friends who just don't realize how much of a burden they are.
I guess I really shouldn't complain. I should consider myself lucky that anyone bothers to put up with my psychotic self. I know I'm getting worse. I'm slipping more and more, not keeping the mask up, finding it so hard to beat myself back into normality. I can't keep slipping. I don't need friends, but I also don't need anymore pills. That's the reason I won't tell anyone else that there's something wrong. I don't want more pills, more doctor's visits, more wasted time telling me there's something wrong with me and giving me a label for the kind of broken I am. I know I'm fucked in the head, but it'd be weak and pathetic of me to let anyone else know that there's another chink in my armor.